Wednesday 5 March 2014

three cute little vietnam-isms

1. happy room

this is where you go when you need to relieve yourself. It has a rating system just like a hotel: a five star happy room is spotless and has plenty of toilet paper and anti-bacterial soap (and you can flush the toilet paper without clogging the toilet); a one star happy room has water/other watery substances everywhere and you have to squat (obviously this is a western rating system). A one star happy room is gross and makes you reconsider whether you really need to go. A no-star happy room is for the desparate; someone's already vomited everywhere. These can be found at most nightclubs.

2. happy place

A happy place is a big roadstop-type place with at least two-star happy rooms and the chance to order decent food. The best meal I've eaten so far on this trip was the pho bo (beef noodle soup, the national dish) at the happy place somewhere between Can Tho and Chau Doc.

3. Doing The Business.

You do the business when you make any kind of transaction involving money, however it's usually reserved for when you have a little shanty-like house on the river and you run a small shop out the back. When you open your shop, you are Doing The Business.